But they didn’t love my mother. They loved no one. Just hated. Hated the fact that this world is uncontrollable. Full with people of free will. Full of unpredictability. However that didn’t stop them from attempting to control it. Whatever it took. Even if it meant making my mother feel dirty for having enjoyed the love of my father. Even when my mother had followed their teaching, it wasn’t enough. It had to be hell. Any bit of fun wakes the devil so it seems.
I myself now have three beautiful daughters. If my wife and I had been around fifty years earlier I would now have none. You see the first two were born outside wedlock. Fifty years ago the church would have intervened to make sure the second one would never have happened. My first born would have been sold, she’s pretty. My wife would have died prematurely in a glorified concentration camp and because I wouldn’t have accepted it, I would have been sent to a mental hospital to rot.
I don’t believe in God myself. But the story of Jesus I heard certainly doesn’t chime with what was rammed down this countries throat. Whatever happened to loving your neighbour? Where did the bit about free will disappear to when it comes to women’s bodies? Whatever happened to the parable of casting stones? In fact from what I can see, if Jesus had been around Ireland in the 40s, 50s and 60s he’d have been locked up himself for being different.
When I hear the line that society was complicit in the latest Church atrocity to be exposed, I get angry. Who are we on about here? People living in overcrowded houses with barely enough to eat. They were expected to speak out? Do I really need to write this. Do I really need to spell it out for those bullshit historians. Does one really have to say – ‘But they too would have been incarcerated if they spoke out’ – Is this not obvious?
Well it is obvious. But accepting this obvious truth can’t be allowed. You see if we dont take the blame then the Church will need to. Sure we couldn’t have that. Especially after all they’ve done for us…
I held my children that bit closer last weekend. For fear of what might have been.